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Many parents struggle when it comes to giving consequences to a child with ADHD. They try different approaches, take things away, set rules… and still feel like nothing is working. It can feel frustrating, confusing, and at times, pointless. But the truth is, consequences do work. They just don’t work in the way we often expect them to. For young children with ADHD, learning from consequences is not as straightforward. Their understanding of time, cause and effect, and emotio

As parents, it’s natural to want to protect our children from feeling upset. We step in, we soften things, and we try to make things easier. But when your child has ADHD, this becomes more complex. Because resilience, the ability to bounce back from something uncomfortable, is not just about personality, it’s developmental. Understanding what’s happening Young children with ADHD often have delayed executive function. This means they may struggle with: emotional regulation im

Sibling rivalry can feel constant in a home with ADHD. It might look like: constant arguments one child always “starting it” tension over small things one sibling being targeted more than the other And often, the child with ADHD is seen as the one causing the problem. But what we’re seeing on the surface… isn’t the full picture. WHAT IT CAN LOOK LIKE Sibling rivalry with ADHD doesn’t always come from one clear reason. It can look like: provoking for no obvious reason taking

Your child gets told off in class…in front of everyone. And suddenly… it’s not just about what they did. They feel like everyone is against them. Like they’re not good enough. Like something is wrong with them. From the outside, that reaction can look too big. But for your child… it doesn’t feel small at all. What you’re seeing isn’t just behaviour This can be the start of what many people describe as rejection sensitivity. Not something your child is born with… but somethi

How many times have you heard this — or even said it yourself: “I’ve tried everything… nothing works with my child.” And underneath that is usually something much heavier: “Am I failing as a parent?” That feeling hits even harder when you are an ADHD parent yourself and already find structure difficult to stick to. You’re trying to put something in place that doesn’t come naturally to you either. The truth is, most parents don’t think structure works. But in reality, structur

Many parents and teachers are told that children with ADHD simply need more structure. The advice often sounds simple: Feeling of no structure Break tasks down. Chunk homework. Use “now and next”. While these ideas are helpful in theory, they often miss something important. Structure is not just about the next step. For many children with ADHD, structure means understanding the whole path, not just the first part. When Instructions Assume Skills That Haven’t Developed Yet A c

Many parents say the same thing: “My child is fine at school, but everything falls apart when they get home.” This can be confusing. Teachers may say there are no concerns, while at home, a child may seem overwhelmed, emotional, or exhausted. For many children, especially children with ADHD, this difference actually makes sense. During the school day, children are often concentrating very hard. They are following instructions, managing social situations, and trying to keep up

Many parents are aware that their child may have additional needs even before they begin school. Some notice differences in behaviour. Others notice that developmental milestones are not being met. Either way, many find themselves in a position where they feel they must wait-wait until school age, wait for assessment, wait for support within the system. Within the SEN system, children are rarely formally assessed before the age of three, and often much later. At a young age,

When people talk about ADHD and developmental delay, the conversation often begins at school. We hear phrases like: “Behind in maths.” “Behind in concentration.” “Behind in maturity.” But developmental delay in ADHD does not begin in the classroom. It begins much earlier. From birth, the emotional parts of the brain are active. Babies respond to tone, facial expression, tension, and emotional climate long before they understand language. In ADHD, research suggests that the de

When children struggle with ADHD, support often focuses on discipline, routine, motivation, and consistency. While these approaches can be helpful, they tend to address behaviour at the surface level. What’s often overlooked is what sits underneath: emotional understanding and internal awareness. From birth, the emotional parts of the brain are active and responsive. The systems that help us evaluate emotions, put them into context, and soothe ourselves develop gradually over

When babies are born, the amygdala and the limbic system are already formed. They may not be able to be used in a cognitive way that we can consciously control, but they are still very much in use. From birth to around ten years old, the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain that helps us rationalise when we feel overwhelmed by reminding us that situations can resolve and are not always as bad as they feel, is still developing. By around age 10, this area typically functio

When children are very young, learning doesn’t look like lessons. It happens quietly, through stories, repetition, and emotional experiences that settle into the body long before they are understood consciously. This is why emotional intelligence is most powerful when it begins earl y. Young children are constantly absorbing information about: how feelings work whether emotions are safe what happens when something feels uncomfortable whether support is available They don’t a

Why these books exist Over the past few weeks, I’ve been quietly publishing a series of children’s books focused on emotional intelligence, especially for children with ADHD and emotional sensitivity. They aren’t written to teach children how to behave better. They aren’t about fixing feelings or rushing children through them. They exist for one simple reason: to help children understand what they feel, without shame. Big feelings don’t mean something is wrong Emotions like

One of the most common ideas shared in ADHD parenting spaces is that children need time to process their thoughts and feelings, especially before sleep. While this sounds supportive, it often misunderstands how ADHD brains actually work. Processing is an executive skill Processing emotions isn’t passive. It requires: working memory emotional labelling sequencing inhibition perspective-taking These are executive functions, the very areas that develop more slowly in children wi

ADHD is usually discussed in terms of behaviours, such as time blindness. Forgetfulness. Disorganisation. Impulsivity. But underneath every one of those struggles is something we rarely talk about clearly enough: emotional experience without understanding. Many people with ADHD — children and adults — feel a lot before they understand anything . Why Emotional Intelligence matters so much in ADHD Emotional Intelligence (EI) is not about “controlling emotions” or being calm al

People with ADHD don’t struggle because they don’t try hard enough. They struggle because feedback lands differently. Dopamine doesn’t linger in the ADHD brain. This means moments of success, pride, or confidence can fade quickly, while mistakes often stick around much longer. The emotional dysregulation of the executive function leaves the ADHD struggling to soothe itself. When someone with ADHD is told they’ve made a mistake, even gently, it can trigger a disproportionate d

The term masking is everywhere at the moment, particularly in conversations around ADHD and autism. While the experiences behind it are real and valid, I’ve become increasingly uncomfortable with how the word is being used, especially when we start applying it to young children. Here’s why. What masking originally meant Masking was used to describe a very specific experience: chronic, involuntary suppression of traits in order to survive socially. It often came from fear, sha

When we watch TikTok or Instagram and see people listing ADHD traits, we often begin adopting those traits as our own. Not because we’re copying, but because ADHD is something we’ve lived with all our lives. It’s familiar. It’s us. So a lot of the time, we don’t even realise what is genuinely “ADHD” and what is simply learned behaviour, emotional patterns, or habits that formed over the years. This is where neural pathway strengthening comes in.(You might hear it called neur

After-school meltdowns can occur for various reasons, and understanding the underlying cause behind your child’s meltdown is one of the most important steps in supporting them. When we assume every meltdown has the same reason, we tend to respond the same way each time, and sometimes that response doesn’t match what our child actually needs in that moment. Over time, our child learns to expect that reaction, and the real root cause stays hidden. When we gently explore what’s

As adults, many of us are surprised to discover we have ADHD, and as parents, this surprise can turn into panic when our children are diagnosed. We dedicate time to frantically learning all we can about ADHD and the specific traits our kids exhibit. This urgency may arise because their behavior is overwhelming and causing chaos in our homes every night. As we accumulate more knowledge about ADHD, we aim to incorporate these insights into our daily routines and adjustments, as